Video. Schedule. Pressure.

It’s Thursday. Two days from now it’ll be two weeks since we published our last YouTube video. That means we should be publishing another video on Saturday to keep up with the 2 week rhythm we’ve set for ourselves. I am not sure what kind of video to produce. I have a bunch of ideas, but these ideas are new territory for me, and I worry how those videos would turn out. Also, it feels like there is a lot of friction for filming B-roll for these videos. Perhaps I am just procrastinating. I feel like I do not have long periods of time in which to shoot this footage, and I tell myself that I need a day of dedicated time, or at least half a day, to film the different scenes. I don’t feel like setting up the lighting or the the camera just to film one section just to tear it all down, only to resume again another day.

I feel like I have all sorts of video ideas but these ideas do not fit into a tight niche. I worry that the channel will not perform as well as it could if I follow my varied ideas and concoct a channel that has “a little bit of this, and a little bit of that”. Part of me says that I shouldn’t worry about it. I am simply practicing, and do not need to take myself so seriously. That is probably true. But I do know that stellar creations are enjoyed by a much larger audience. It feels good to create something that is enjoyed by lots of people, not just 7 or 8 people, or whatever.

I may just start writing a script and then film myself and start filming B roll. I think that is the right thing to do. Then the video will be what it will be. At the very least, I will get some practice. Even if I only get this video done by Saturday night instead of Saturday morning, I would feel like I haven’t let myself down.

Impossible to slow down?

It’s Saturday night. It’s been a week since I’ve been back to work full time. This week, I did all sorts, with the one constant task which I’ve returned to every day being a new product booklet that we are hoping to have ready for the upcoming Spring show season. I feel like I cannot settle down to work deeply for very long. Either there is an interruption in my day brought on by one of our people, or the interruption is due to my inability to concentrate and my apparent need to bounce my mind around. But who doesn’t need a break periodically when staring at a computer screen and trying to wrestle multiple creative elements onto one cohesive page? Then I also feel like the product booklet should not be taking so much time to complete. But perhaps I simply overestimate how much work I can get done each day or week?

After supper at home, I’ve worked on the Wilde Treats website. Here, I have tremendous fun. Building websites or e-commerce stores is so much fun. At least the architectural part of it is so much fun. Sometimes I think I would enjoy running a website design firm. But really, doing the architectural web design would be the fun, not doing all the necessary administrative work. I also feel this to be true at work. It is the creative work that I crave (especially web design) and not the laborious admin work. I’ve sometimes felt like a mother when doing admin work. At least in the sense, that I am indispensable and so much energy is being sucked out of me. I’m sure there are people in this world that thrive on admin work.

Some days I feel like trying to slow down is futile. I work 7 or 8 hours at work and then come home to work on a website. Effectively this makes for a 12-13 hour workday. I don’t know. Then I have more and more ideas that continually rush into my head. More product websites to build. More things to sell to customers that I would enjoy using myself. And on and on… I need unlimited amounts of time and money and a general manager who would happily do all my admin work so I can go on my website building adventures. Good night, and happy new week!

Back to Work

Today was the first day back to work after taking most of the month of January off. Since our work is somewhat seasonal, most of the staff took January off.

I have mixed feeling about going back to work at the office. The cons? Not being able to sleep in to 8:30 a.m. Not being able to spend most of the day with my little family. It would be so much fun to make a living without the 8-5 job the business requires at this stage. Hopefully one day, we’ll be able to work together as a family, creating videos and selling products we love to create. Another con? I noticed a couple pimples emerge on my forehead just today. I usually have very few pimples on my forehead, and I am noticing my stress bodies stress response. At one point this afternoon I had cold sweat running down from my underarms. And I wasn’t dealing with anything particularly stressful. I was simply focusing and working away. I need to learn to moderate my stress response.

The pros of going back to work? Working at a project that is larger than life is rewarding. Taking the revenue from 3.5 to 4.25 million this year seems like a goal that is fun to tackle. Other times, I wonder if we will keep moving the goal post higher and higher, meaning the feeling of going from 4.25 to 5 million will feel exactly the same as the previous step up. That doesn’t feel very exciting. That was a rabbit trail. Another pro? I enjoy working with some of our high energy guys in particular. Saying hello in the morning and knowing that they have a livelihood in part because of my efforts gives me that feeling of being needed.

My to do list for today (as copied from my Microsoft To Do app:

• Pray

• Pull weekly data

• Have a look at Tariffs, and make a plan for purchasing lumber.

• Get info prepped for Cambridge series, including asking Micah about siding

• Get back to Jonathan.

• Ask Darvin for a conversation.

• Review our goal meeting and pull todo’s and record data.

• Respond to Leandro on the logo.

• Check to see when Cufca training is happening in March.

• Document stating that some tools are to be provided by employee.

• Look at discounts for February?

• Collect stock report on materials from Taiga

• Ask Scott for an update.

I just noticed that all of my to dos, except for one end with either a period or question mark. Whatever. I also had a couple of phone conversations throughout the day and answered some questions that came up from our guys in the shop. I felt more productive than I would from a typical day working at home.

Now I need to be off for a quick bath and then I need to read for 30 minutes. After that, it’s…

Goodnight!

Conservation efforts and freedom…

After church, we chatted with someone about the conversation projects that are supposed to be conserving 30% of the world by 2030. Locally, meetings are being held to inform about these initiatives. While I love nature, and parks are great, these super aggressive conservation efforts smell of control. I don’t like it.